In Memorium

On Friday we had to make a very hard decision. We had to have our 16 year old cat Circe put to sleep. She had been having major problems and well we didn't want to see her suffer so we made the hard call.

Circe in our condo circa 1999

I got her back in '97 when she was 3. She was living with some guy who worked for my mom and he was moving and couldn't take her with him. So my mom and my ex-stepfather (who was a sucker for cats) took her in even though they already had 3. I happened to come home from college for the weekend right after they got her. She was used to being an only cat and strictly indoor cat and she was being forced to be an outdoor/indoor cat with 3 other cats. Well she hated it. All of it. The being outside thing and the other cats too. She took a shining to me and stayed in my room with me all weekend. I had just recently moved to a one bedroom apartment by myself and was thinking it would be nice to have pet. So I decided I would take her home with me. I don't even think I asked my mom and ex-stepfather, I think I just told them I was taking her. And so she became part of my family. My husband came along not long after Circe. She moved with us to another apartment, our condo and then finally here to our current house. She even dealt with us getting a puppy and then another kitten.

Circe making it clear that she was really our first not our newborn son

On top of that she went through the toddler phase (well she almost made through ... my daughter is still 2 and still kind of in the toddler stage) with both of my children. She was a very sweet and loving cat but she always made her self and her needs known, sometimes rather loudly I might add. But she was the start of my family and I miss her dearly. Her place on the couch is hard to look at without her there. But she is in a better place. So here's to one of the best cats there ever was .... Circe.

Confessions of the Day 12

I was actually relieved when I realized I had promised a friend I would watch her baby so that I didn't have to go volunteer in my son's classroom this morning. Don't get me wrong I know volunteering is a good thing and all, plus I do it twice a week and have since the beginning of school. But for some reason 9 times outta 10 I work with all the other reading groups but not the one my son is in. I like getting to know all the other kids but I would also like to see how he's doing but when I don't get to work with him that makes it hard. And even better I got to stay home in sweats and play with a baby!!

I had a piece of chocolate cake for lunch. Oh and a glass of milk. Yep that was my whole lunch...

I "accidentally" deleted the Veggie Tales movie The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything from our Tivo list because I am so tired of it! Not to mention I just can't stand the Veggie Tales.
I promised to play Wii with my son and he picked out Wall-E which has a few good multi player games. Well he manged to beat me in EVERY game we played. And no I did not let him win. I was really trying to beat him. It's really sad my 6 year old now has better hand eye coordination than I do.

New

New is the new word for my life. I am faced with the painful fact that I have to go back to work. At first I just freaked out and cried and got really blue about it. The last 6 years have been the best of my life. Being home with my kids has been the best thing ever. But financially we need more income so I have been forced to reevaluate my career. I was a special education teacher before I stayed home with my kids but I accidentally let my teaching licence expire last year. So if I did go back to teaching I would have to get re-certified at the same time which means taking classes while I am working full time. Which is a big NO WAY. I would already be away from my kids all day and then I would have to deal with classes. Yuck!!!

My dream is be an artist/crafter and make a living that way but it's hard and takes time. I have an etsy.com account and have been selling through it and here locally to my wonderful friends. I just wanted to show off some of the frames I have made but given away. This first one is one I made for my mom it's origami paper punched out like puzzle pieces and arranged on the frame.


This second one is one I made for a really, really good friend of mine and it is made with scrapbook paper I punched into circles of different sizes and then arranged.



They aren't the best pictures because I took them (and I am so not a photographer) quickly just for myself because I knew they were not going on to etsy.com. But I love them all the same. Now if I could just start selling some more....
In the mean time I am looking into taking classes to become an Esthetican (facialist/waxer). I can shape a mean eyebrow and there is not a zit that scares me. And I'd like a new path to head down. So we will see where all this leads....

What my daughter will not be listening to

I was in my minivan driving my children somewhere or running some errand or another while listening to my iPod because frankly listening to the radio either makes me angry (conservative talk shows), bores me (too many freakin commercials), or just plain makes me feel old (new songs or artists that I don't know and don't like). So I listen to my iPod on shuffle a lot (OK 98% of the time) in the car. Well the song Lovefool by The Cardigans came on. You may remember this song was a fairly big hit back in the late 90's because it was on the Romeo + Juliet soundtrack.
It's got a great melody an I used to love it, and then I heard it again and really listened to the song lyrics. Go ahead and read them below.

Lovefool Lyrics
Artist(Band):The Cardigans

Dear, I fear we're facing a problem

you love me no longer, I know
and maybe there is nothing
that I can do to make you do
Mama tells me I shouldn't bother
that I ought just stick to another man
a man that surely deserves me
but I think you do!

So I cry, and I pray and I beg

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
love me love me
pretend that you love me
lead me lead me
just say that you need me

So I cried, and I begged for you to
Love me love me
say that you love me
lead me lead me
just say that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

Lately I have desperately pondered,
spent my nights awake and I wonder
what I could have done in another way
to make you stay
Reason will not reach a solution
I will end up lost in confusion
I don't care if you really care
as long as you don't go

So I cry, I pray and I beg

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
love me love me
pretend that you love me
lead me lead me
just say that you need me

So I cried, and I begged for you to
Love me love me
say that you love me
lead me lead me
just say that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

(anything but you)

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
Love me love me
I know that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

Can you see my problem with the song???? Holy crap I can't believe I ever LOVED and IDENTIFIED with this song! How sad is that? I used to feel this summed up my dating life and the really sad thing is it did at certain points. It just makes me remember all the losers I dated and how lacking in self esteem I was. Boy did I date my share of losers but thankfully I smartened up and gave a nerd a chance and met a wonderful man (the nerd) who I married. So needless to say I will be taking Lovefool off my iPod rotation because my daughter does not need to hear such utter nonsense! I just wish it wasn't such a catchy song ......

Cutie Pies aka My Kids

There is a local photographer named Dana Jackson who also happens to be a friend and former MOMS Clubs member of mine. She only started out a few years ago and she is one of the most talented photographers I have seen. She did my daughter's newborn pictures 2 years ago and they were amazing. So when I saw that she was running a Valentine's special I jumped on it because she is amazing and I wanted to get the kids done together since it had been over a year since I had. And as usual they are wonderful and I just had to share! So head over to her blog to see my cuties and a bunch of other cuties too. Also check out her website here and if you are ever in eastern North Carolina and need/want a photographer you should consider Dana.

Reflections from 2009

2009 came to a close very quickly for me. Looking back on the year I have learned one very important thing; life is short and can end too quickly. I watched my friend Meg loose her 5 year old daughter to cancer, I watched my friend Jennie loose her mom very suddenly and unexpectedly and I just lost my wonderful uncle Gordon to cancer. So tell those you love how much you love them every chance you can. Don't wait to do the things you always wanted to do. You never know how much time is left. And most importantly ENJOY things. I have a tendency to take things waaayyy too seriously but life is just too short to be so serious and stressed out. I am also trying to take a page from my uncle Gordon's book and enjoy family.

Pimpin Myself Out

I must apologize for my very infrequent posts as of late. It's that time of year and things are just so busy. Between the usual mommy stuff and all the Christmas stuff I have very little free time. And what free time I do have, I have been hard at work crafting for my new venture. Katiemade Crafts on Etsy.com. I love crafting and have always had some project I was working on weather it's a scrapbook, making candles, cards, clocks or calendars. Anyway I am selling some of my creations on on my Katiemade Crafts site on Etsy. Right now I just have some frames I have decoupaged but I intend to add more things as I have time. So I know Christmas time is hectic but check out my shop and maybe pick up a present or two or three....

Soap Box (again)

So I will admit that I am a full on Facebook addict. I spend waayyy too many hours a day checking out what all my "friends" doing, playing Farmtown or Yoville, or just generally wasting time. I have a "friend", well lets call it what it really is shall we? I have an acquaintance that I may or may not have met a few years back who was in the same mother's group as myself. She has since moved away but asked to be my Facebook friend a few weeks back. And who am I to say no?? I just didn't want to be mean and hell what's one more person. Anyway she is apparently going through a rough time (based on several what I hope were drunken status posts). Well she used the F word. OK not fuck because I have as you see no problem with that word. No she used the F word that rhymes with maggot and is a derogatory word used to describe gay people. And yes I detest this word so much I will not even type it (much like the more known N word). It is a word generally used with such hate about gay people that it turns my stomach. So I made a personal vow to never use the word myself. It bothers me when people feel like they can use it whenever to refer to anyone because they don't like something. I can't stand people using gay words to make things negative because it casts all gay people in a negative light. Some will say I am over reacting and calling someone the F word or telling someone "they are so gay" is no big deal. Well it is. It's the start of intolerance which is never good. When I was teaching high school this word was used a lot by the students along with the phrase "that's so gay" or "you're so gay". I banned both the F word and the using the word gay to describe something the kids didn't like in my classroom. I tried to explain to them how much pain and discrimination these words cause. So when my "friend" used the F word my first thought was to unfriend her (but we all know how I hate that). So I haven't unfriended her so instead I am on my soap box again on this blog. But the next time you think about using the F word or calling something gay think about it first please. You care condoning intolerance and hate.

Confessions of the Day 11

My son started full day Kindergarten and as much as I as mourn the loss of my baby growing up so fast, but I am also loving how much time I have now with only my daughter and the alone time when she is napping!

My plants desperately need watering but it means finding the watering can and using a step ladder, so part of me is wanting to just let them die so I don't have one more thing to take care of anymore.

I confess! I am soooo tired of Oprah. I used to watch her show everyday in fact I watched pretty much every day from age 10 until just recently. I just got tired of sad depressing topics, her take on things (we don't agree a lot), her pimping of O Magazine, and her way over priced expensive crap on her favorite thing shows that everyone raved about. So I took her off Tivo and at first felt really guilty but now I find it liberating somehow.

I watch Jon & Kate + 8 just to see the train wreck even though it depresses me.

I am addicted to iced mochas from McDonald's. I just wish they trained their employees better so they knew the friggin difference between a latte and mocha.

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